SAKIN!

  

PASTE STAIN 

Tülin was clearing the table after dinner. While transferring the food into a small pot, she almost dropped the spoon in her hand. The oily, tomato paste juice of the meal was all over the spoon. It almost got on her recently wiped carpet too! Fortunately, she caught the spoon before it fell. But even though she was lucky the first time, she was not so lucky the second time. The spoon, which had taken its place among the dishes, slid towards the floor and then fell. The scene she had just escaped had just happened. The carpet, the kitchen cabinets, everything was covered in paste.

On a normal day, she wouldn't have cared this much, but today she cared a lot. It was as if her world had collapsed around her. She sighed so deeply... Her husband came to see what had happened.

-Honey, what happened? You're okay, right?

-No, I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine, but look at the carpet and the cupboards! It's a mess!

-It's okay, honey, we'll fix it. I thought something happened.

-Something has happened, Hayri. Can't you see? There's tomato paste stains everywhere!

Tülin stormed out of the kitchen. Her husband Hayri stared after her. He was trying to understand why she was so angry. Why was his wife so upset? Why was she so angry? Normally she didn't care much about such things. She would immediately do what needed to be done and move on. It had to be something else that made her angry and upset.

Tulin was not really angry about this situation. This was the last drop. What she had experienced before had cumulated and now it had caused her to explode. The last few days had been full of such incidents for Tülin. There were incidents that she didn't want but couldn't intervene. These were big and small cases. Situations that she would not even make an issue of on her own, but that overwhelmed her as they continued...

She started her week by embarking on spring cleaning. As the weather warmed up, she set her cleaning plan in her head. She was going to clean every corner and prepare her house for the coming spring. Besides, she was going to have boarding guests for the weekend. She would have made preparations beforehand. Cleaning always meant relaxation for her. But not this time.

It was when she called Fatma that her plans didn't go as she wanted. Fatma had been coming to help with the cleaning for years. Tülin called her again for support. But when she called, she heard that Fatma had a back pain. She was in so much pain that she couldn't go to the cleaners. Fortunately, she had started treatment, Tulin thought. Her own mother also had a back pain. Tülin knew how much pain it caused and how difficult it was. She felt sorry for Fatma. When she came to clean, she said, "What can we do this time? I'll take care of it myself." With this in mind, she started to clean. Then another setback happened. The day she started cleaning, Tülin received a call from the school. They told her that her daughter was sick. Like all her classmates, her daughter Ayşe had fallen ill. Moreover, she was running such a fever that the doctor had decided it would be more appropriate to hospitalize Ayşe. Three days later, Ayşe had barely recovered.

When they returned home after three exhausting days, the unfinished tasks were laid out in front of their eyes. Ayşe had pulled herself together, now Tülin could get back to the housework. And so it was, one by one she started to do the tasks she had left unfinished. She was trying so hard to make everything complete! On top of three days of exhaustion, this exhaustion was too much. She ached all over. Even though Tülin felt very weak, she was now determined. In her mind, she kept repeating the sentence "Everything must be finished and it must be beautiful! Everything had to be perfect!

The Experiential Design Teaching says: “You cannot control everything in life.”

In life, sometimes there are good days and sometimes there are bad days compared to others. Good weeks, bad weeks... It's like the weather, really. The sun doesn't always shine and sometimes it rains all of a sudden.  There are times when no matter what one does, the day is bad. No matter how hard he tries, he can't get close to his goal. Even if he does his best, things don't go the way he wants. In this case, what one needs to remember is that one cannot control everything in life. The only thing to do in such times is to accept it.

Tulin was actually having one of these days. The more she focused on perfection and wanted it, the opposite happened. Actually, what they had experienced were small issues. But they overlapped so much that they disrupted her whole plan and prevented her desires. As she strived for the best, she was distracted from her desire by the events she experienced. That was the importance of that tomato paste stain on the carpet. No matter how much Hayri Bey didn't understand, it was the last drop of the glass. It was the visible trace of the misfortunes. That's why it had devastated Tülin. A small issue had thus become a big issue.

It took a long time for Tulin to realize this truth.

In life, sometimes things don't go the way we want them to. On the contrary, we try hard, we struggle, and setbacks come one after another. However, the results are not under our control. So what we can do is not to achieve perfection but to do our best.

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Experiential Design Teaching is the knowledge of reality that enables people to design their future through past experiences. It offers individuals strategies they need in order to solve their problems and achieve their goals.

"Who is Who", "Relationship Mastery", "Psychology of Success" programs provide individuals the methods to being happy and successful.

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"Out of billions of people, what importance can "one" person have?

To know the answer ask that "one" person!"

 Yahya Hamurcu